"Awake in the Darkness: How I Discovered and Released Unresolved Grief"

I found myself awake in the middle of the night again, sitting on the couch with a heavy heart. Anxiety and sadness wrapped around me like a fog, and I couldn’t seem to break free. I tried to meditate, hoping for relief, but instead, tears began streaming down my face. My mind wouldn’t quiet, and the inner critic crept in: “You help your clients navigate pain and anxiety all the time—why can’t you help yourself?”

The voice grew harsher, pulling me deeper into shame and overwhelm. I felt trapped, spiraling further into the darkness.

But then, after what felt like an eternity of breathing and sitting with myself, something profound surfaced. A realization that shocked me to my core: I was in the grip of unresolved grief.

Unresolved grief is what happens when we experience events so overwhelming that they feel impossible to bear. To survive, we bury the pain, pushing it deep into the shadows of our being. But buried emotions don’t disappear—they linger, resurfacing when we least expect them, often with greater intensity.

For me, the unresolved grief was tied to events from 30 years ago—events I thought I had processed. I had talked about them. Written about them. But I hadn’t truly felt them. I had held onto the anger and pain, believing I had every right to feel rage for things that were beyond my control back then.

What I didn’t realize was that this righteousness was keeping me stuck—blaming others, shaming myself, and remaining in the role of the victim.

In those quiet, tear-filled moments, something shifted. I screamed out loud, “No more! You have no control over me anymore. It’s time for you to leave.”

And that’s when the release began. Waves of grief poured out through sobs that I couldn’t hold back. Within minutes, the weight started to lift. Calmness and relief took their place, like a warm embrace after a long storm.

In that moment of peace, I chose to do something different. I opened my heart and sent love—not just to myself, but to the events, the people, and the pain I had carried for so long. Love became the balm for the wounds I had ignored.

This was my breakthrough, and it changed everything.

Has this ever happened to you? Do you find yourself awake at night, wrestling with sadness or anxiety that won’t let go? It may be unresolved grief calling out to be released.

You don’t have to carry this weight alone. Healing is possible. If this resonates with you and you are willing to talk about it in a private, professional setting, please schedule your complimentary “Healing Journey Discovery session”. Allowing is the first step for healing. Looking forward to meeting you and supporting you.

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