Healing Unresolved Trauma
I am up in the middle of the night again. Sitting on the couch feeling anxious and depressed, focused on these negative feelings and how to release them.
Tried to meditate and tears started rolling down my face, unable to quiet the mind long enough. The voice in my head started creeping in “you help your client go through pain and anxiety all the time, why can't you get yourself out of it”? Followed by other words that were not as friendly.
Feelings of shame, anxiety, and overwhelm kept pulling me down into more darkness. Finally, after breathing and calming my mind, what I noticed shocked me to my core. Realizing that I was suffering through what is called “unresolved trauma or grief.”
Unresolved trauma occurs when we experienced overwhelming event(s) that is too much to tolerate in the past. To protect ourselves from feeling the pain, we pushed them down and avoided the disturbing emotions. That is why some people turn to negative habits to soothe their nervous system, such as drinking alcohol, using drugs or turning to food to name a few additions. But at some point, in the future, emotions that were pushed down, reappear to be released with a stronger force.
For me the Unresolved Trauma was around events that happened about 30 years ago. Events that I thought I was ok with even though they hurt deep inside.
I had talked about them and wrote about them but never felt them and allowed them to leave.
You see, being right to be angry and have rage about certain events in the past, caused me to blame and shame either myself or others that kept me holding on to the trauma for over 30 years. (I know I am aging myself, lol)
Realizing all of these in a matter of minutes, I started screaming “no more, you have no control over me anymore. It’s time for you leave”. That’s when the grief started releasing through crying and sobbing that followed by calm and relaxation in a matter of 10 or 15 minutes.
Feeling calm and relaxed I decided to open my heart and send love into all the events, people involved and incidents that started coming into my vision. The love I felt helped me heal the parts that needed to be heard and loved.
I felt I had to share this personal story to bring awareness for people who might be experiencing something similar.
Has this ever happened to you? If it has and you’re tired of dealing with sadness or anxiety in the background that may keep you up at night. No reason to suffer even a moment longer. Let’s talk!
Call 866-908-4325 or email me zoya@healingwithcompassion.com
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